Where is Guy Fawkes when we need him?

Until the recent adoption of his distinctive curly moustaches by the Anonymous movement poor old Guido Fawkes was in danger of becoming nothing more than a historical footnote. I can remember how, as a child, no Autumn fireworks party would have been complete without an effigy of this 17th C. attempted regicide being hauled up on top of a bonfire. “Remember, remember, the fifth of November, for gunpowder, treason and plot” we sang as he burned. But more recently it seems that, in my children & grandchildren’s time, while the November 5th celebrations may be just as popular with ever bigger and more spectacular fireworks displays, the tradition of immolating a traitor has come to be considered in poor taste.

Not so much so in parts of Kent, it would seem. Many people throughout the world who had never even heard of Edenbridge, were heartened to see the Donald Trump honoured with his own individual pyre, thereby joining the ranks of previous unpopular luminaries such as Sepp Blatter, Lance Armstrong and Saddam Hussain. But however amusing this might have seemed on November the 5th, that same world woke up to the real nightmare on November the 9th. The seemingly impossible had actually happened, what some commentators had called “Brexit times one hundred” meant that a populist backlash vote had left the inmates in charge of the asylum.

Who knows whether the Donald and his inflammatory, xenophobic rhetoric will succeed in “Making America Hate Again”? One wonders whether there is anyone left in America with the presence of mind to make the office of President so restricting, so arduous, so uninviting that the petulant little “Man Baby” will walk away of his own accord. I hesitate to make any glib suggestions in the face of global Armageddon but personally I would take away all his toys (for security reasons of course) and chain him up in the Oval Office with a never ending schedule of frustrating and pointless administration.

We are now told that in true Dictatorial style, members the Trump family are already being manoeuvred into positions of authority. Unless someone in the US moves fast, the largest military power in the world risks being run by sons Uday and Vlad Junior and whoever daughter Ivanka is currently married to. So many people in America asked me how Britain could possibly have voted to leave the European Union. Well, I’m afraid I obviously failed to explain clearly enough how the forces reason were caught napping in the UK and the dreadful consequences that now have to be faced.

It is no co-incidence that the two British players most keen to cosy up to the President Elect are Boris and Farrage, our own home-grown architects of chaos who, co-incidentally, did not expect to win the referendum vote and have been revealed to have had no idea how to bring its vainglorious promises to fruition. As much of America reels in shock and horror, we might do better over here to concentrate on our own difficulties and face up to a future of our own making.

Categories: Britain, North America

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